It really seems like the agency is putting you in an awfully akward and emotionally difficult situation. Liscor's letter looks good. Be vague.

I worked for an adoption agency and while I was not directly involved with the families, I know nobody was asked to write to birthparents. As GM said, their rights are terminated.

If you are adopting from foster care, there are generally no fees at all. The state will pay the agency fees. Some agencies do charge a fee for training and an application fee. I would be very suspect of anyone who tries to charge you more than $1000. In our state, you could get that money back when you finalize. The state would reimburse you.

Good luck!
UNM